• Don’t Wannabe All By Myself

    Well Ken should be somewhere in Kentucky on route to Atlanta, moms ifs going to a NA convention in Tennesese which leaves me the odd man out. But there won’t be any pity-parties in the Mercer House because I shall be utilizing my non-paid holiday time to eat some Ham I’m bound to fuck up in Wednesday and kick back watching th Transformers marathon on Thursday on Cartoon Network, the Law & Order marathon Friday on TNT and maybe even do something incredibly stupid like go to the mall on Saturday.

    I’m in desparate need of clothes. Realize earlier last week that I look like a fucking bum and this travesty needs to be rectified ASAP. But alas, a negro is broke and because of this non-paid holiday and the 10 day non-paid break at Christmas I wont have anything to exchange for Kenneth Cole and banana Republic joys. Guess its my fault for spend my money of gadgets and electronics. A technosexual without the clothes is just a nerd. And nerds still aren’t cool.


  • Spendin’ Money Like I Don’t Have Bills

    Sometimes I think the titles of my posts are actually longer then the post itself.

    I made a big step on Friday. It’s probably something thats gonna bite me in the ass, but I can live with it now. For a minute I’ve been going back and forth bout getting an iPod. The main reason for not getting one was I didn’t that much time listening to music. Granted I do have about 4000 tracks (or 375 CDs) but they only time I listen to anything is either when I’m listening to Howard Stern in the morning or mix-cds I got from The Slim One while I’m in my Piece ‘O’ Shit, going to work.

    ipod

    I’m a avid mac user, and submit to the expense bullshit when I paid $2200 for my PowerBook, so I couln’t use the standard negro excuse. So I did it. I went out Friday morning and bought a 20GB 4th generation iPod. I didn’t get the 40GB cuz I wouldn’t be carry all my music with me and the 20GB was only $50 more the the iPod mini.So I had all weekend to play with my new toy, and now I can’t see myself without carrying it everywhere I go. I sync’d up my contacts and my iCal to it and I’ve been trying to set up my playlist “On The Go.” I really don’t see how people can get a subpar mp3 player, try to hype it up to be as good as the iPod.

    Okay, I’m done being on Steve Jobs’ dick…


  • WalMart Is The 3rd Rung Of Hell

    I was in a serious rage about working Saturday night, I took my lunch to see if I could go buy some happiness. And there are no street walkers in Hammond, not that I’ve been looking… that much… recently… anymore. But I need to spend some money to forget that I was working until 2am over the weekend. So I drive down the street to the local Walmart to check out some movies and PS2 games.

    First off the place was packed, It was the first saturday of the month and as my dearly departed grandmother, Rebecca would say; “Fuckin’ welfare receiptants everywhere!” Personally, I don’t care how people make their money as long as it isn’t made by robbing my black ass but I digress. The Negro Force was out in full effect; as I was strolling around the electronics to get a copy of Shrek 2 and hopefully Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas and I run into one of my road dawgs, John.

    John use to work for one of the US Senators for Indiana but got caught up in some bullshit, like fucking a 15 year old and now he uses his Master’s degree to assistant manage the Walmart. I say my pleasentries, and attempt to make plans to hang out the next day. I say my goodbyes, turn around and damn near walk into some nig and his 5 kids. Not only was all 5 kids under five years old, one of them was funky as fuck. Like goats fucking pigs rolling in horse shit kinda funky. Now I would normally just walk away but I had to get back to work and they was all just standing there around the shit I wanted. I would have said something but the smell was already fucking up my ofactory nerves, I was not bout to open my mouth to start tasting that shit too. So I wait for bout a good minute, and as the shittlings start to run away from the Weekend dad, I notice its not the kids that stink its the dad that smells ike moist armpit in sitting in the sun.

    At that point I was like “fuck it”, they didn’t have Shrek 2 or GTA: San Andreas over here. I turn around to go to some other display with the cheap DVDs and this other negro is there, looking at shit. He glances up at me and he has this long and big ass open ass wound on his face. Some true horro movie looking type of shit. This niggas was up in Walmart, face bleeding, no bandage and had smeared vaseline/neosporen on it.

    I bounced before the lepards and shit decided to get they shop on. I hate going to Walmart.


  • Election Day

    Eventhough I already voted today and feel confident about voting democratic becasue of their stance on issues that matter to me and to other people of color. I got this email today from my best friend Ken about how the vote is going down in the Southern states. I didn’t want to put my boy on blast like this but felt that it was too important to not share.

    Hello, How are you on this Election Day? Are you registered to vote? I am, and I’m going to vote for Kerry when I get home from work this evening.

    I talked to my mother sunday night for a minute and she got on my nerves. Evidently many black churches have instructed their members to vote for Bush because Kerry is not against gay marriage and abortion. The Republicans are attempting to use the message of Christianity to brainwash black people into thinking that voting Republican is the religiously correct thing to do because they know that most black people have christian family members, if they themselves are not christians. I think that is absolutely ridiculous.

    Republicans wish to do away with welfare, social security and public housing. Republicans refuse to improve the public healthcare system for the elderly and retired, and they refuse to provide any sort of assistance to help seniors buy their expensive medications. Its gotten so bad that senior citizens are getting together and chartering buses and driving to CANADA just to buy their medication. This affects me personally beecause my grandparents who both have blood pressure and blood sugar issues complain about how high their medicine prices are getting, and how their gov’t medical assistance is barely helping out. They’re both retired and they both together barely receive enough SS to pay the mortgage and utilities and buy their meds.

    Then there’s my sister who although she’s not on welfare anymore, still lives in government housing in south Georgia. Bush wants to do away with public housing and encourage everyone to buy a house because its the American Dream. Unfortunately, thats the case for many people, homeownership is only a dream. How is my sister who works at Walmart to single handedly raise her two kids gonna be able to buy a house if they decide to stop funding her subsidized apartment complex? She’s not prepared to own a house mentally or financially. Tearing down affordable housing will cause people to be homeless, not homeowners. If everybody could own a house, my guess is that they would. But that isn’t the case. There are people who haven’t yet learned financial responsibility and aren’t ready yet to own a home. Telling them to go buy a house would cause them to commit financial suicide. Many of them are are young and on their own and living in affordable housing because their families couldn’t tolerate them anymore for whatever reason, or they had a child and therefore need their own affordable space to raise that child….

    Republicans are all about giving big tax breaks to the countriest richest 2% of the population and doing nothing for us. More people lost jobs under Bush’s presidency than any other presidency in history. Our economy hasn’t been this bad since Bush’s father was in office.

    These are all my reasons for voting for Kerry. He is for building better affordable housing, and he’s for increasing the strength of our social security and healthcare programs. He’s concerned about the average American, the other 98% of us that Bush is trying to sweep under the carpet.

    I don’t think its politically correct to vote for someone because he says he’ll be sure to stop gay people from getting married. I don’t think its fair to try to use politics to enforce your religious beliefs on an entire country. America is supposed to be the land of the free, meaning freedom of speech and freedom to worship how we please. I feel that its not within our rights to force the rest of the country to comply with the Bible no matter how strongly we believe it. That isn’t the purpose of politics or voting.

    We need to realize that as black people, we are doing ourselves a disservice by voting Republican. My mother is 54 and my stepfather is 49. Neither one of them have ANY savings, or retirement plans. They live paycheck to paycheck in their 2 bedroom apartment in Georgia and continously rely on me as well as other family members to help them out when either one of their 12 and 14 yr old cars breaks down or when they need help paying an unexpected bill. They both will likely have to work for the rest of their lives because its not likely that whats left of social security will be able to fully sustain them when they’re old enough to retire in another 12 or 15 years. But they’ve foolishly decided to vote for Bush because he’ll prevent gay people from getting married.

    Now just how stupid does that sound? I did not intend for this e-mail to be this long, I just started venting about what my mother said to me Sunday night. I was mostly mad because she’s so mis-informed about the presidential race and the democratic vs. republican issues in general, and she used something as stupid as gay-marriage as her reason to go to the polls and shoot herself in the foot.

    Come on black people, we need to be more informed about whats going on around us. Lets not just take someone’s word for something, lets do our research and find out for ourselves. Lets vote for what matters to us. If you’re not trying to marry a member of the same sex or trying to abort a baby, why are you concerned about others doing it?? Why can’t we be concerned enough about our own issues and what matters to us rather than trying to control the rights of everyone else???

    ————————–
    Kenneth E. Brown
    Homeowner since 2003


  • Can’t Feel My Arms

    Well not only did I take my iggnant ass back to school, I gave up some money and took my fat ass back to the gym. I had a good work out… focused on my arms, back and chest which pretty much means that I’m a non-functional invalid from the waist up. Now being like this wasn’t bad at 7am this morning cuz all I had to do was wash my salty chocolate balls and take my ass to bed. But now its 10pm and I’m sitting here at work, and caught myself flinging my useless arms around into random objects and people. If you were able to see you too would comment on how gay its to see me walk without moving my arms. Shit sucks, but I’m going back to the gym either tomorrow or Monday. Now I’mma go sneak a power nap in the back room…


  • Going Back

    I’m finally taking my iggnate ass back to school. I knew that PUC would be glad to suck my money my pockets but daymn… I’m taking three classes and the price without the books is $1500. I miss my financial aid… makes me wish that I didn’t abuse the system and end up on financial aid probation. Oh well gonna go hustle my way into $1500… “5 Dolla Suckie-suckie?


  • Tony’s Adventures in Bubbleland 2

    this is like, 3 days late but anyway…

    I like going to the laundry mat cuz there’s always something there thats gonna fuck you up for the rest of the day/night. Wednesday night was no exception. So I’m at the laundry mat and already stuff all my shit into some washing machines, some of the good big load machines int he front near the good TVs (the ones not playing Telemundo or Univision). I sit my ass on this row of benches, to the right is the fornt door and outside is the fifth South Shore train to go by since I’ve been here and on my left is the Kid’s section.

    Now the Kid’s section is nothing more then some filthy-ass indoor-outdoor carpet, a step and a TV with no volume playing a tape of the old Ninja Turtles cartoon. So nothing is wrong… nothing to definitely trip about, until this dude walks in with his daugther. He’s wearing a baseball with all this hair sticking out of the back. “Ok, I think he’s just ‘fro it up.” So he proceeds to take off his hat and I wanted to die laughing. This nigga had a fucking Tape Haircut straight from 1986. Now if you don’t know what a tape is, let me try to explain. Picture a low fade, but as it gets to the back of your head where your neck meets, a two-inch of nappy nigga hair. Essentially it’s the negrotastic version of a mullet that was believe to be extinct since the mid 80’s.

    The shit was horrible, I wanted to take a picture like he was the last white rhino in Africa type of shit. I was so thrown off that I didnt watch my clothes in the dryer and now I have scorch marks in my draws.


  • A Fucked Up Question

    If you don’t know already, I’m pretty much fucked up in the head. And in my mental downtime and in the porcess of having a “self-conversation” aka I was talking to myself something really askewed popped into my head.

    If you could suck your own dick, would that make you gay?

    I have my own opinion bout this but I kinda want to know what others thought about it.


  • Eeh…

    Not gonna lie… I haven’t been around cuz I simply didn’t want to be. Actually I was too tired to be concerned, which doesn’t sound any better. Essentially work has left me so drained and tired that the synapses just fail to get going and I’m left in a semi-austistic state, literally drooling and mumbling non-coherent bullshit like a lobotomized crackhead.

    Anyway I’m back and trying to find my “center” but excuse me as I wipe the crud outta my eyes.

    BTW… Derek I have been informed by the LA Blacks that you need to stop bullshitting and start blogging again


  • Pornography Is A Gateway Drug

    I will be the first to admit it, I’m a black man who masturbates and I’m not ashamed of it. Its kinda like a drug and porn was the gateway. I don’t think I even really got into beating off until I started to porn. In high school I would be the first home and had bout 2-3 hours before anyone came home. I had time to find my dad’s flicks which my step-mom tried ever so hard to hide, either from us the kids or from my dad himself. I know where my dad got his stach, from my god-dad, my Uncle Lloyd and had boxes and boxes of flicks. You love going over there when I was kid, hoping that I could catch a glimpse of issue of Black Tail or see if I could pocket a flick (sorry Uncle Lloyd) and sneak it home. Most of the time I failed, sometime I suceeded.

    By my junior year I had a nice little stach going for myself. And pretty much everyday I would be home around 3:30 laying in bed with the remote in my right hand and my dick in the left. I was sad and patethic then, no different then now. I don’t know if I ever would have choke the chicken so much in life if it wasn’t for porn. I really don’t have much of an imagination and magazines don’t do it for me (I need my pictures to move). I needed more stimuli to make the one-eyed monster throw up.

    Now before I’m judged and labelled as a pervert, just know that I’m not the only one who looks at porn and shakes hands with the man, I just not ashamed to admit it. I have a healthy yet sparactic sex life and I’m safe & clean. Yanking my own chain keeps me outta trouble and I’m not spending my rent money on porn, not obsessing over or stalking any porn people. I don’t drain the main vein all the time, I barely have time to do it. I don’t have toys or gadgets, I don’t try to live out porn fantasies eventhough I did learn this on position from a flick thats as far as it goes. So as taboo as porn and monkey spanking goes I’m in lowest percentile of those who are masters in the Art Form